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The average male who is old enough and mature enough to want to marry has realized that sex is not always a triumph.
I'm not saying he is sexually insecure: indeed, with the right woman he may be easygoing, studly and confident.
Interesting essays could be written on how men should choose women, or how men wish they chose women. The fact is men can't help looking, even happily married men, even codgers who think Viagra is better than money. This may seem too obvious to even mention, but in fact it is the key to the whole thing. " 'Ruthlessly pragmatic' Scientists say men and women are both designed to be ruthlessly pragmatic in their criteria for a mate.
But we will focus on a topic of more practical interest: in the real world, how do men actually choose women? If you make it difficult to be seen -- for instance, if you sit in the back booth with shades on -- you stop Step One from happening. (Note that being seen is particularly crucial -- and achievable -- if you are trying to meet Mr. Women are programmed by evolution to choose men based on their father potential, which is closely associated with status in the group -- what we now call money and power.
The men are responding in kind, but meanwhile they are both, as discreetly as they can, checking Rachel out.
The first thing we need to face about men is this: they are animals. They may end up valuing her for the "right" things, the things she wants to be valued for. But no matter how strange men are, if you're a woman who wants to meet the right man, you have to clue in to how men think. Men's eyes are always wandering, seeking out that which they could and would impregnate. Shameful attraction Men are, in the first place, looking for "attractive." Now what on earth does that mean? A face that strikes Tom as sexy may look shallow to Harry. So forget about how superficial men may be and realize that they, like you, are hard-wired in mysterious ways, which may or may not be as shallow as you think.
He senses in her an unswerving confidence in herself and in the cosmos, and a capacity for aggression, that make him feel he may be out of his league.